If EVERYTHING EVERYWHERE ALL AT ONCE Got A Round Of Reality TV Network Notes

Michelle Yeoh protects Key Huey Kwan and Stephanie Hsu in a scene from A24's EVERYTHING EVERYWHERE ALL AT ONCE

“Where are the lower thirds we asked for?”

EVERYTHING EVERYWHERE ALL AT ONCE FINE CUT 2

NOTE: This contains spoilers of the film that has charmed the world and is an awards darling. If you don’t want to be spoiled, please watch the film or verse-jump to a universe where hot dog fingers aren’t a thing.

Thank you so much for the last cut! We really appreciate the hard work your team has put in. Unfortunately, we still aren’t close to where we need to be, so we’ll need yet another extra cut so we can really hone in on the story and some execution problems. We desperately need a bite pass to help clarify what’s happening. a lower thirds pass is an absolute must, and let’s dig deep and come up with some new music cues. Once these things are done, we’ll send time coded notes. We’re happy to help!

Also, there are a lot of clearance issues we need to clean up before we can lock. Do appearance releases cover alternate dimensions? Please have your legal department look into that. The Chapstick product placement is clever but it may be too much (see below).

OPENING

Right off the bat, this is confusing. We see slo-mo of Evelyn, Waymond and their daughter singing in silence in a reflection of a mirror then there’s a jump cut of no one in the mirror and then Evelyn is sitting at a table with a ton of receipts? I have no idea what is going on here! And if I don’t, our viewers will instantly change the channel. Let’s start with a b-roll montage of Simi Valley, then a wide shot of the laundromat and then Evelyn at the table. And then? The big intro bite I’ve been asking for! For four cuts already! Something like “I’m Evelyn Wang. My family and I run a laundromat here in Simi Valley. Today is really important as not only is it my father’s birthday but also I have an IRS audit. I’m really nervous about it! I hope it goes well!” (Please get that verbatim). By telling the audience exactly what’s going to happen, they can follow along easily and that is storytelling!

There is a lot going on in the laundromat - we have customers asking for clothes, a man complaining about losing money in the change machine and Joy with her girlfriend. There are too many things going on, this is choppy and chaotic and not a representation of the quality storytelling this network is about! Remember, this network’s shows are a second screen experience, so we have to make our audience can understand our stories while they are going through hashtags on TikTok. Let’s streamline this area: focus on Joy and her girlfriend (with an intro package from Joy) and also establish Waymond (with another intro package). The close up on the divorce papers seem like he is interested in divorcing his wife but there’s no interview bite to go with it. How can I know if he wants a divorce unless he TELLS US? Please give us a nice funny, point-to-point, concise, natural bite from Waymond setting all of this up.

THE IRS VISIT

I know we see the Wang family pull up the IRS building in front of the IRS sign but let’s make sure we aren’t making too many assumptions here. Let’s add a lower third that says “IRS Office” with a set up bit from Evelyn reiterating why she’s nervous about this meeting with the IRS and how she hopes Waymond will be supportive. If we aren’t in Evelyn’s head here, then we aren’t weaving the most interesting story possible! Remember, constantly telling the audience what the story is is what storytelling is all about!

THE ELEVATOR RIDE

Whoa whoa whoa, what’s going on here? Waymond is suddenly acting out of character and starts giving instructions to Evelyn? Slow down here, Tex! Let’s add a bite here from Waymond explaining what he’s doing. Mysteries may be good for PBS Sunday nights but not our network!

The flashback of Evelyn’s life is well edited but it needs a couple more effects for it to really read as a flashback for our audience. Let’s add two mortises and a filter to really drive that home!

THE AUDIT

Please make sure you have an area release for the IRS office space.

Deirdre is such a fun character. (She in fact auditioned for another one of our shows but that’s a story for a different day.) Where is her intro package? Let’s get something like “Yes, that’s right, it’s Deirdre Beaubeirdre, IRS auditor extraordinaire. I’m a patriot who loves her country and does what she can to make sure that people obey the law! I take my job very seriously and I do not tolerate foolishness!” (Please get this in her own words and verbatim).

Alpha-Waymond’s explanation of multiverses is confusing! Let’s add a big bite from him (with a lower thirds that says Alpha-Waymond so we know which Waymond is talking) with a graphic explaining the multiverse. Ooh, maybe license some images from The Avengers movies! I don’t know how expensive that would be, but please license them anyway in a way that that is budget-conscious.

Double check with S&P but we may need to blur Deirdre’s Auditor of the Month awards.

Let’s add a disclaimer at the opening saying that assaulting an IRS officer is not endorsed by this network.

The Chapstick product placement is super clever and fun. I’m not sure we should encourage people to eat it. We had a bad time at ‘Fear Factor’ dealing with something similar. Please double check your footage and recut it.

FIGHT WITH DEIRDRE

Okay, we have this big concept of tapping into skills in our alternative selves and this lo-fi GFX package is what we’re seeing? This can’t be right! A big concept calls for a big graphic package and this is just crappy and low quality. Let’s reimagine this is something bolder and eye catching, like THE CIRCLE or FLIP OR FLOP.

JOBU TUPAKI

Wait, the big evil is Evelyn’s daughter? And she can turn people into glitter and luchador wrestlers? While we appreciate her bite package about the everything bagel, we need to know more about her. Let’s get her back in the chair and have her explain herself. Her motives seem jumbled; why is she trying to kill her mother? Why is she in an Elvis costume? How can we know her motives without her telling us exactly what she wants at al times? Guys, this is sloppy.

A lot of the music is ethereal or whimsical. Can we try something else more engaging and modern? Maybe some hiphop or Little Mix soundalikes. Let’s discuss!

Can we clear Raccoon-atouille? Please double check.

Thank you for blurring the security officer’s genitals in the butt plug fight but the lead up is a little too suggestive for the time slot. Please rework.

DEIRDRE’S APARTMENT

While they aren’t exactly obscene, the dance between Evelyn and Deirdre with the hot dog finger feels like it’s an S&P issue. Please blur throughout.

Evelyn’s breakdown and flashing through universes is energetic editing but confusing. Let’s add a lower third on each universe she falls into. That’ll help explain things a lot and explaining is the heart of telling a good story!

ROCK WORLD

I have no idea what’s going on here. Let’s make it a snap in.

EMPATHY FIGHT

Oooh, I see. Evelyn has finally understood that connecting to the good part of herself can help others and ultimately herself. At least, that’s my guess. Without a bite, how am I to know for sure? HOW AM I TO KNOW? Get a bite in here.

We need this turned around pretty fast but I’m confident you and your capable team can do it. As a thank you, how about a muffin basket from Joan’s on Third? Let me know; I think you can pay for it out of your petty cash. Thanks!